Ever wanted to know what Kim Kardashian’s butt feels like? Be able to eat the laces right off your sneakers? And who needs Nike Mags when there’s self adjusting Yeezy-squeezy technology, right?

All of these features make up the never-before-seen Yeezy Boost 2000 sneakers. Or at least they might, if the model wasn’t a purely fictional (and hilarious) prank by US TV host Jimmy Kimmel.

Proving some Kanye fanboy’s, ahem, dedication, to the cult of Yeezus, Kimmel’s crew bought a pair of $12.50 high tops from Chinatown in LA and glued on some fake fur “cloned” from Mrs Kardashian-West’s hair and a compass in honour of the couple’s child, North West.

Naturally the public went mad for the fake kicks, offering up to $1,000 for a pair, and that was even before being told Kanye plans to plant a tree in Israel for every one sold(!)

“I need me a pair of these,” one shopper said. “It’s got the compass right here, so you letting them know right where you walking at. They won’t see you coming at all.”

“I feel like I would be able to jump higher in these,” another reasoned.

Take note, Kanye, Kimmel might be on to something.