OK, it goes without saying that this is an important one to get right.
Your cool sister is right. Black and navy are not a good colour combination. It's a little old, tired and uninspired. The bluer your suit (moving into royal blue), the better a black shoe will look. Any shade of brown will go navy, but can understand why you might not want something quite as bold as tan for your wedding.
If it were me, I'd strongly consider oxblood. They aren't so bright as to be garish, but will give a stylish edge.
I would avoid the vibram soul: it's gimicky and too fashionable: you want to be stylish not fashionable on your wedding day, no? Go for a leather sole. I personally would avoid the brogue for a formal occasion and go with something simpler and sleeker, but it's your wedding.
These are beautiful, although hideously expensive (but will give you an idea of what I am trying to describe):
Church's*Burwood Wingtip Brogues*|*MR PORTER
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