You’ve saved three long months for a Loewe shirt. The big debut (your partner’s office party) is just around the corner. Your threads are bound to impress. That is until somebody asks you where said shirt is from. It can’t be lerv-eh? Loo-vee? Maybe even low?
Save yourself the embarrassment with our definitive guide on how to pronounce everything that matters in fashion. At least you can sound like an expert.
Gucci’s groundbreaking new creative director.
Italian fashion house that is very good at leathers and fragrances.
An ostentatious Swiss watch brand worn by rappers worldwide.
Spanish brand that has long pushed unusual silhouettes.
Swiss fashion brand that first offered elastic-closure shoes.
Heavily embellished fashion brand, often worn by Kardashians.
Swiss watch brand famous for meticulous hand-painted dials.
Italian brand known for classic tailoring.
Balenciaga alumnus, now in charge at Lavin.
Italian brand famed for its separates.
Luxury Italian jewellery brand – don’t be fooled, the V is Latin for U.
French fashion house with an often plagarised interlocking C logo.
French fashion designer that started out in theatre sets.
Comme des Garçons
The fashion label behind Dover Street Market; actually Japanese, despite the name.
Kom di Gar-sonn
A Georgian designer responsible for Vetements, now in charge at Balenciaga.
Dolce & Gabbana
Italian design duo; fond of Sicilian tailoring and lots and lots of flowers.
Doll-chay and Gab-an-a
In charge at Versace, fond of blond hair and oil-slicked topless men.
Dries Van Noten
Belgian fashion designer known for striking prints.
Drees Van No-ten
Italian luxury house and the largest menswear brand in the world by revenue.
The late founder of Versace, brother of Donatella.
Gieves & Hawkes
Bespoke men’s tailor on Savile Row since 1771.
Geevs and Horks
Aristocratic French luxury brand, founded in 1952.
Italian brand first famous for luxury leathers.
Colombian designer in creative control of Berluti.
English fashion designer who was once official dressmaker to Queen Elizabeth.
Former creative director at Saint Laurent; famously dropped the ‘Yves’.
French fashion house famous for very expensive scarves.
Japanese designer, likes a pleat.
Swiss watch brand that first pioneered a reversible dial.
British fashion designer; led Dior, said some indefensible things while drunk, and is now at Maison Margiela.
Japanese designer and former protégé of Rei Kawakubo from Commes des Garçons.
Iconic designer behind Chanel and Fendi – has a cat named Choupette (shoo-pet).
French fashion house often labelled the oldest of its kind.
Spanish fashion brand that has undergone major rebranding under Jonathan Anderson.
Swiss watch brand with the industry’s oldest registered trademark (a winged hourglass, if you’re asking).
The world’s most profitable luxury brand with a world famous monogram print.
A fashion brand offshoot from the French electronic record label.
Formerly known as Maison Martin Margiela; French minimalist designer brand.
The founding designer behind Prada and Miu Miu.
French outdoors brand that made the move into fashion.
A tongue-in-cheek Italian fashion brand, now headed by Jeremy Scott.
French fashion designer and creative director of Louis Vuitton, formerly of Balenciaga.
Creative director at Balmain, enjoys taking selfies.
An English fashion designer of Ghanaian descent, known for classic tailoring.
Italian fashion brand, sometimes worn by devils.
Belgian fashion designer that enjoyed a stint at Dior before heading up Calvin Klein.
The designer/mastermind behind Commes des Garçons and Dover Street Market.
Italian fashion designer in charge at Givenchy.
Swiss watchmaker known for advanced, futuristic watches.
French fashion brand now known for leathers and rock-inspired threads.
Italian fashion brand that produces leathers, shoes and apparel.
American designer, enjoys a stripe.
One of the oldest (and most expensive) Swiss watch brands.
Italian fashion brand known for Greek meandros-style prints (the tiled borders you see in Roman swimming pools).
Surreal designer brand, part streetwear, part cult label.
A leading South Korean menswear brand known for skilled tailoring.
Yves Saint Laurent
The French founder of the eponymous brand.
Eves San Lor-on