There are plenty of times when the style world has lost its menswear-y marbles (deep V-necks, glitter beards, Vibram Five Fingers). But Vans’ latest collaboration – a range of sneakers with New York label Opening Ceremony – may well take the crown for impracticality.

Not that they’re an eyesore in the slightest. To the contrary, the Old Skool line-up is as handsome as any trainer collab we’ve seen this year. The problem is the fabric: satin. As in year-nine-prom-dress-notoriously-difficult-to-maintain satin. For a brand that carved a reputation for hardwearing, skate-ready treads, these sneakers wouldn’t last a minute on the walk to work, never mind a half-pipe.

Even with the typically sturdy Vans construction and coming in four so-cool-it-hurts colourways, once you factor in all the daily travails your kicks endure, it’s easy to see why this material is best saved for souvenir jackets.

However, if you do fancy your chances, or just show scant regard for the cost-per-wear ratio, you can pick-up a pair from 11 August online at Opening Ceremony, priced around £80. But you might want to also buy a gallon of shoe protector, too.